So next Spring my book will be published in North America and Canada, thanks to a lovely little publisher’s called Skyhorse. How cute is that name? It reminds me of galloping ponies in the clouds, maybe even unicorns and Care Bears. I like it a lot. It wouldn’t be the same if it was called SkyTiger would it? That would just sound like a cheap airline. Or SkyRacoon, or SkyMillipede,… ugh. I think they picked the right name.
Apparently I will have to edit it a bit for the American market, which may mean inserting a happy ending where Dubai is completely finished and everyone lives happily ever after, but who knows. Maybe I’ll just have to change all the s’s to z’s and everything will be fine. Either way, I’m happy to have another play with the text. As a perfectionist I’m sure I could re-write entire chapters if allowed, which I won’t be. I’d like to write a few songs in, too, as I know American’s like things with songs in them. Maybe Miley Cyrus could sing something when a little button is pressed on the cover? I’d like that. I think book shops would like that too – imagine the whole store blurting out Miley Cyrus at regular intervals! It would get annoying after a while though, the song would overlap itself as kids pressed different buttons at different times. An eight-track Miley Cyrus in stereo. The staff would have to wear earplugs. The book would eventually get banned… which would actually be cool because everyone always wants what they can’t have. Perfect. Let’s get it banned!!!
Anyway, I’m excited about this. I love America and I really, really hope they like my book. Canada’s nice too, though I’ve only been to Niagara Falls, so I can’t really comment on its people. The only people I met there were people like myself, all wearing bumbags and taking photos and saying things like “Ooh my gooood, there’s so much water!” I’m sure they’re nice too though. I hope they like burqas.
I should say, Amazon.com still have the book listed, which they shouldn’t, because although they’re letting you order it, it won’t be delivered till America actually gets it in stock, NEXT YEAR. So don’t order it yet, else you’ll be waiting ages! Same goes for the UK. It hasn’t been sold in the UK, so even though I’m British I have to change things like Boots Meal Deal into Starbucks SuperSize and you have to pretend I’m from the U.S. If anyone would like to print it in the UK please do, but tell us first, don’t just go photocopying it. We will find you.
I’m excited. I want to go to America and have a launch party so you must all come. I understood when you couldn’t come to the Australian one because it’s really far away, but America is the centre of the universe, so there’s no excuse.