Things I’ll miss about Bali, part 2: (warning, laser beams are included)


Of course I’ll miss my trusty steed here – my Scoopy, which may have had a clapped out wing mirror and rust in the most unspeakable of places, but still sped me from A to B in stylish safety throughout my time in Ubud (for about $35 a month including gas). I’ll also miss my laundry coming back in a vacuum sealed bag (nothing like a bit of suction to make your pants seem smaller) and smelling of a freshly washed unicorn.

But most of all I’ll miss the people. Like my landlady and her son here.


They’re the sweetest of people who were always out front with a beaming smile and who brought me fresh fruit for no other reason than “it’s a full moon. We have ceremony. We give fruit.”

I love a place that gives gifts on a full moon. It’s almost like a fairytale land without the werewolves, right? Instead of vampires on the loose we get a mango and a rice crispy cake in a basket.

The Balinese are some of the most fantastic and FASCINATING people I’ve ever met… take my driver today, Komang, for example, who told me the most bizarre stories on the way to the airport! We were talking about the weather and how it’s going to be rainy in India when I get there and he said: “ah, it should be rainy in Bali too, but not since they shot laser into clouds.”

“Sorry, what?” I said.

“Yes, they not like rain for ceremony, so they shoot big expensive laser into cloud to make rain disappear.”

I had no clue they could do that, did you?! The Balinese can control the weather. Maybe I’ve been living here too long but I’m more likely to believe a story about a black magic-infused rain dance stopping a tsunami than I am about the government spending billions of rupiah on a contraption to send cloud-blasting lasers into the sky to stop the rain.


I’ve had some truly incredible, life-changing adventures in Bali over the years, most of which are printed for the world on the pages of Balilicious – The Bali Diaries obviously, but many more of which are lodged in my mind, where they’ll stay till the day I die and make me feel forever grateful to have had this time in fairyland. There’s magic here, I tell you!

It’s time to move on, however. Bali will always be my second home, but for this single thirty-something, it’s time to find my first.

See you soon Bali. Stay fruity. xxx